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Helping your children remain objective during your divorce

When you and your spouse decide to pursue a divorce, one of the biggest challenges you may face is the uncertainty of your relationships with your children. Often, you will need to negotiate and make critical decisions regarding child custody, child support and relocation. At Fowler Bell, we have been able to help many people in Kentucky to create parenting agreements that are designed to protect the best interests of their children and still provide satisfaction to both parenting parties. 

If you and your spouse disagree vehemently on certain topics, chances are there have been times when your children have overheard stories. Handling divorce details carelessly may sway your child's opinion one way or the other depending on the relationship he or she already has with you and your ex. If you want to help your children to remain objective and continue positive interactions with yourself and your ex, Web MD has some suggestions for you including the following:

  • Do not use your children as therapists who you can vent to and share your frustrations. While investing in professional therapy is a valuable idea, your children should not have to listen to you lament about your situation. 
  • Do not treat your children differently during the periods of time they get to spend with your ex. Rather, encourage them to have fun and when they return ask them about what they did that they enjoyed. 
  • Do not rely on your children to act as messengers to relay information between you and your ex. Regardless of how you correspond with your ex, the communication should be direct and not passed between your children. 

When you remember these tips as you help your children cope with your pending divorce, you can help them to remain objective and continue to form good relationships with both of their parents. For more information about negotiating child custody agreements, visit our web page.  

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